Even if “Wednesdays apply,” your life still has meaning
On a brisk fall day, I pointed my snappy, red car toward our small-town grocery store. We were nearly out of milk, and I knew the fallout if that were to happen. No milk for dunking cookies? Coups have been staged at the house for less than that and so, eager to avoid citizen unrest, I ran for the store.
I was standing in the line when the young, dark-haired cashier spoke. “Do Wednesdays apply to you?” she chirped.
Huh? What?
“Do Wednesdays apply to you?” At my utterly blank stare, she pointed at the yellow sign posted by the register. “Seniors get a 10% discount on Wednesdays.”
Startled, I said, “Depends on what age that is.”
“Fifty-five.”
Well, shoot fire. This side dish of cold, harsh reality was not what I was expecting as I skipped along in time with the sunshine. As I reported it to my husband later on, “I felt like throwing myself on the floor.” He chuckled.
Thanks to the surprise appearance of the caboose on the end of our family train when I was thirty-nine, I’m still feeding a teenager. Why, it was just earlier this summer that we graduated his tail and finished, at long last, a full 16 years at the high school. For the past eight years, he was the only one in the school system, keeping us involved in PT conferences, homework, birthday parties, sports, choir performances, drama, and the general whirlwind of having a kid in school. Looking back now, it kept us young. Hence, my reaction to the cheerful cashier’s question.
What came to me, upon reflection, was that many people never live as long as I have. Names and faces went through my mind. A great-niece passed away this summer at the age of three months. A friend’s 30-year-old son died last week. Two young mothers are gone, felled by cancer, just to list a few. It was this realization that brought me back around and turned my heart to gratitude.
As young as I might feel, I know that I’m past the halfway point of my life. I don’t want to get old. I don’t want my body to age, and yet it reminded me that this life is a gift. That’s the first thing.
The second thing that came was that as long as I’m alive, there is work for me to do. I have vibrant hopes and dreams. Retirement doesn’t interest me. There’s too much to do, and so my colorful plans and desires keep me going. Shot through, they are, with hope, and that hope keeps me feeling young and filled with purpose.
We have seen it repeatedly in our business. Elderly clients who keep moving and who live with purpose, live longer. Their quality of life is higher, and they can be vibrant into very old age. Conversely, those who stop moving and doing often suffer a noticeable decline. There appears to be a significant connection between mental attitude and the rate/effects of aging. This is not scientific, but it is what we’ve observed. The evidence is convincing enough that we’ve taken it to heart.
We want to live while we’re alive.
For us, that means staying active and involved with our grown children who are out in the world. When they were little, we were busy building a business. Now that we’re established, we are beginning to have the luxury of time to support them in their endeavors around the country. Mom and Dad will come to them to offer service and help.
It also means that we continue to cultivate our own dreams and goals. We want to live purpose-filled lives, not withering into quiet, colorless resignation, and we want our sons to see that. Getting older doesn’t mean our unique giftings have gone away. In fact, they’ve been enhanced, growing exponentially through decades of practice. We still have much to offer, and we’re rarin’ to go.
There is also this. We have lived long enough to amass a storehouse of wisdom. Such wisdom can only come through the experiences that life brings—the hard and trying times, the exceedingly good times, and the lessons that come with them all. This kind of wisdom is worth far more than gold. The elderly souls who carry it are the richest of resources for all who are younger and behind them on the path. Age alone does not afford wisdom, but age plus a thirst for it surely does.
Our lives have been impacted forever by older people around us. Some of them taught us what not to do. Countless others, though, instructed us on living well, raising kids, loving God, having faith, doing business, managing money, and living courageously. At times, these erstwhile teachers used words. Often, it was their living examples that transmitted the lessons. Without a word, their lives alone did the teaching.
If you are in despair at your advancing age, your aches and pains, or your seeming inabilities, take heart. You are still alive, and there is work for you to do. You carry an inviolable dignity, no matter your physical or mental condition, just because you are you, created by the God who loves us all.
As I tell my own sons, “At every age and stage, you were perfect in my eyes.” What I really mean is this, “At every age and stage, you were perfectly loved. You still are.”
What’s true of them is true for us all. At every age and every stage, we are perfectly loved. Perfectly, completely loved. Now, live from that.